Get Free Ebook Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook), by Steven C. Hayes
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Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook), by Steven C. Hayes
Get Free Ebook Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook), by Steven C. Hayes
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Amazon.com Review
Trying to "change" negative thoughts through cognitive gymnastics is like trying to win a war single-handedly. Why waste a life trying the impossible? In Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, advocate Dr. Steven Hayes escorts the mildly depressed, angry, and anxiety prone through a new approach to handling suffering--universal human suffering caused by language's illusions. Rather than fighting off bad thoughts and feelings with internal pep talks, Hayes beautifully explains how to embrace those pessimistic and foreboding mental voices (much like welcoming home one's cranky, play-worn children), "defuse" them with respectful attention, and commit to leading a purposeful life that includes their occasional ranting. Intriguing exercises help readers identify their core struggles, parse these into manageable pieces, and develop effective ways to move beyond rumination. The work progresses easily, thanks to Hayes' engaging style and his grace in coaching readers. Critics of cognitive and behavioral therapies will warm to Hayes' logical explanations of language's pitfalls (even language used by other therapeutic approaches); his sometimes goofy--but surprisingly effective--exercises; well-timed etymology lessons; and his uncanny ability to predict and skillfully address reader reactions throughout the workbook. Ironically, the path to life clocks many hours in the mind; plan to dedicate an intensive month of introspection to this program. Anyone who has been accused of thinking too much, who begrudges compliments, pines for a different life, or feels trapped at a mental dead end can benefit from Hayes' superior guidance.--Liane Thomas Dr. Steven Hayes answers a few questions about his book, and describes how his research was inspired by his own struggles with panic and anxiety. Questions for Steven Hayes Amazon.com: Can you give us a lay person's primer on acceptance and commitment therapy? Steven Hayes: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is based on a rather remarkable fact: when normal problem solving skills are applied to psychologically painful thoughts or feelings, suffering often increases. Our research program has shown this in thousands of patients, in almost every area of human suffering. Fortunately, we have discovered why this is and we have developed some ways of correcting it. The basic research underlying ACT shows that entanglement with your own mind leads automatically to experiential avoidance: the tendency to try first to remove or change negative thoughts and feelings as a method of life enhancement. This attempted sequence makes negative thoughts and feelings more central, important, and fearsome--and often decreasing the ability to be flexible, effective, and happy. The trick that traps us is that these unhelpful mental processes are fed by agreement OR disagreement. Your mind is like a person who has to be right about everything. If you know any people like that you know that they are excited when you agree with them but they can be even more excited and energized when you argue with them! Minds are like that. So what do you do? ACT teaches you what to do. I will say what that is, but readers need to understand that these mere words will not be useful in and of themselves. Minds are too clever for that! That is why the book has so many exercises and why we have a free discussion group on line for people working through the book (http://health.groups.yahoo.com/group/ACT_for_the_Public/). What ACT teaches is acceptance of emotions, mindful awareness of thoughts, contact with a transcendent sense of self, and action based on chosen values. This constellation of skills has shown itself in controlled research to help with an amazingly large range of problems, from anxiety to managing the challenges of physical disease, from depression, to stopping smoking. Amazon.com: Some of this work is said to have come from your own battles with anxiety and panic. How did these ideas apply to your own struggles? Steven Hayes: It was my own panic disorder that first put me on to the problem we have now confirmed in our research. My panic disorder began a little over 25 years ago. I watched in horror as it grew rapidly, simply by applying my normal problem solving skills to it. Anxiety felt awful and seemingly made it impossible to function, so it was obvious to me that I first needed to get rid of it before my life would improve. I tried lots of things to do that. But this very effort meant I had to constantly evaluate my level of anxiety, and fearfully check to see if it was going up or down as a result of my efforts. As a result, anxiety quickly became the central focus of my life. Anxiety itself became something to be anxious about, and meanwhile life was put on hold. After two or three years of this I'd had enough. I began to experiment with acceptance, mindfulness, and valued action instead of detecting, disputing, and changing my insides. I remember a moment that symbolizes the change in direction. In the middle of a panic attack, with a guttural scream like you hear in the movies, I literally shouted out loud to my own mind. "You can make me feel pain, you can make me feel anxiety," I yelled. "But you cannot make me turn away from my own experience." It has not been a smooth path and it was several years before anxiety itself was obviously way down (getting it to go down was no longer my purpose, remember, but ironically when you stop trying to make it happen, often it does), but almost immediately life opened up again. ACT is the result of over 20 years of research, following the lead this provided. Amazon.com: You are a language researcher and chapter two of Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life is called "Why Language Leads to Suffering." Can you tell us why you suggest that language is a source of human suffering? Steven Hayes: Human language (by that I mean our symbolic abilities generally) is central to effective human cognition. It evolved to keep us from starving or being eaten--and it has done a pretty good job of that. The key to symbolic processes is the ability to relate events in new and arbitrary ways. Our research program has shown this ability even in 14 month old babies, and we now know it comes from direct training from parents and others as part of normal language development. It is a wonderful skill. It allows us to imagine futures that have never been, and to compare situations that have never actually been experienced. That is the every essence of human verbal problem solving. But that same process has a downside for human beings. For example, it allows us to fear things we have never experienced (e.g., death). It allows us to run from the past or compare the dull present to a fantasized future and to be unhappy as a result. And in my case it lead to the common sense but ultimately unhelpful idea that I needed to get rid of anxiety before I could live well. We get a lot of training in how to develop and use our minds, but we get very little training in how to step out of the mental chatter when that is needed. As a result, this mental tool begins to use us. It will even claim to BE us. The overextension of human language and cognition, I believe, is at the core of the vast majority of human suffering in the developed world and human technology (the media) is only amplifying the problem by exposing us to an ever increasing stream of symbols and images. Learning how to get out of your mind and into your life when you need to do that is an essential skill in the modern world.
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Review
“With kindness, erudition, and humor, the authors of Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life educate readers into a new way of thinking about psychological issues in general and life satisfaction in particular. Their combination of cutting-edge research and resonance with ancient, tried-and-true practices makes this one of the most fascinating and illuminating self-help books available. If you’re tired of standard psychological parlance and still frustrated with your quality of life, this book can be a godsend.” —Martha Beck, columnist for O Magazine and author of Finding Your Own North Star and Expecting Adam. “This manual, firmly based on cutting-edge psychological science and theory, details an innovative and rapidly growing approach that can provide you with the power to transform your very experience of life. Highly recommended for all of us.” —David H. Barlow, professor of psychology, research professor of psychiatry, and director of the Center for Anxiety and Related Disorders at Boston University. “This is the quintessential workbook on acceptance and commitment therapy. Written with wit, clinical wisdom, and compassionate skepticism, it succeeds in showing us that, paradoxically, there is great therapeutic value in going out of our minds. Once released from the struggle with thought, we are free to discover that a life of meaning and value is closer at hand than thought allowed. This book will serve patients, therapists, researchers, and educators looking for an elegant exposition of the nuts and bolts of this exciting approach.” —Zindel V. Segal, Ph.D., the Morgan Firestone Chair in Psychotherapy and professor of psychiatry and psychology at the University of Toronto and author of Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy for Depression. “This book is a user-friendly tool for clinicians who may be looking for adjunct handouts for clients with a wide variety of issues. Exercises found within can help deepen, structure, or guide experiences contacted in session. As a stand-alone self-help book, it brings to light the guiding principles that make ACT such an empowering approach. I highly recommend this book to clinicians and laypeople alike.” —Sandra Georgescu, Psy.D., assistant professor at the Chicago School of Professional Psychology.
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Product details
Paperback: 224 pages
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications; 1st edition (November 1, 2005)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1572244259
ISBN-13: 978-1572244252
Product Dimensions:
8.2 x 0.8 x 10.8 inches
Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review:
4.2 out of 5 stars
284 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#2,868 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
I urge you to get past any shortcomings you find in this book in terms of editing or repetitiveness, of which there are several. What the author has to say is extremely important and could be of great help to readers who struggle with anxiety and obsessive thinking, or those who are grieving traumatic childhoods or lost marriages. Fans of NPR's Invisibilia will recall the first episode in which a therapist worked with a man who had intrusive thoughts of killing a loved one. The therapist did things that seemed crazy, but worked brilliantly. This success was attributed to cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and the reporter missed the mark in an otherwise excellent podcast, by attributing CBT to Aaron Beck, when it was originally the work of Albert Ellis, PhD. This book explicates more correctly the type of therapy suggested in that podcast. Rather than talk people out of how they are feeling, Hayes and his ACT cohort argue that we will feel what we are going to feel and we should not flee from that, but instead embrace it and then choose what course we want in life based on our values. Of course that's simplifying things, but the author is scrupulous in telling readers that there are no easy answers and yet there is hope and a meticulously laid-out way to live beyond those fears. If you read one "self-help" book this year, it honestly should be this one. The book can be heavy at times, but so is life. Completing this book won't make life light and airy, but it will help the reader elect to have greater meaning on the journey. And in the end, that's what it's all about.
This book changed my life. I was in the midst of the worst depression of my life, suicidal, didn't leave my apartment for weeks at a time, and couldn't afford a psychotherapist. One day, I decided to go to the best psychotherapist in town for just one session, to see what happens. I told him I couldn't afford to see him regularly, and he advised me to work through this book. It was a long process, but here I am 5 years later with no depression and genuine, no-joke happiness all the time. This book helped me become unblocked from all my negative thinking and take the steps necessary to live my best life. I cannot thank this author enough. This is an incredibly important book. It requires patience and diligence to reap the benefits.
I discovered My spouse of 28 years was leading a double life for 2 years and was going to choose to stay with the woman, who was cheating on a husband who was loving and devoted..his only crime was to get lupus. So I hoped this book would help me with my tremendous grief and feelings of betrayal. It did. I would recommend this for anyone dealing with pain of any kind.
As a lifelong anxiety/OCD sufferer, I just recently started exploring ACT after a recent OCD flare-up. I have really fallen in love with ACT and Dr. Hayes theories. He has an incredible ability to convey relateable and understandable information (he also used to suffer from panic disorder himself). I've had luck with CBT and ERP therapy in the past, and although my anxiety was usually manageable, I still found myself fighting with it on a daily basis. Through ACT, I am slowly (emphasis on SLOWLY), learning to accept my anxiety as part of my life and part of who I am. In conjuction with mindfulness, I am using this technique to view the fake "stories" and dialogue in my head without reacting to them. OCD can cause horrible, intrusive thoughts, and this book has helped me to better respond to those thoughts and to recognize that my mind is not my true self! We don't have to believe everything our mind tells us. I highly recommend this book to anyone suffering.
REALLY enjoying this book so far. Very different approach to therapy. Not results oriented, but rather process focused. It is less about taking control of your feelings, but learning to better experience your feelings and living/moving towards your values.
This is exactly what I was looking for: a guidebook for helping yourself, as opposed to some kind of textbook. The author uses lots of commonsense examples to really illustrate what he's talking about not to professional psychologists, but to everyday people who are suffering. The book is very well organized and the chapters are small enough to read in an afternoon and digest. It is filled with small exercises you can do to either prove some of the points made by the author to yourself, or to gauge your progress in applying what you have read. Highly recommended book; if you want a taste of it, there is a free sample on the Kindle app that will really give you a strong feeling for the content in the book.
This book is great for reassessing your life, finding peace in yourself, and just learning to let people muddle in their own crap and know when to back away.
Very helpful for someone who suffers from anxiety and especially OCD. I got Postpartum OCD/anxiety and this book helped me to realize what the thoughts meant. Whenever I feel anxious or "stuck" I read portions of this book to help.
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